Pushing Through The Hurt

Is there anything going on right now that you need to take responsibility of? I mean probably, we all do. So why is it so hard to take responsibility and own up for our mistakes and faults? Personality is believe it’s because we are human, others may say it’s our ego or the need to be right. All of these are true, but overall it depends on the person. The worst thing about not being able to communicate, is trying to forgive someone for not being able to communicate.

Having friends is very important, but in order to have good connections with them you both have to be able to communicate properly. For example I have this friend, we met in 2020 and ever since then she has been my best friend. We were so close and knew practically everything about each other. We both were going through stuff but we always managed to never let it affect our friendship. Everything was going good, then my friend’s boyfriend broke up with her; this caused her to go through a really hard time. So on top of dealing with this break up, she also started going to a new school where she knew no one. All of this made her mental health really bad and her communication skills(which were already bad) worse. Over time we started to realize that she would slowly stop talking to everyone as much, and no matter how much we tried to help her, she just wouldn’t talk to us. We’d have to catch her on a good day otherwise we wouldn’t be able to tell her anything. And even though we knew what was going on and knew why she was being the way she was it really hurt us because we were all losing one of our closets friends.

Even through all the hurt that she was causing us we still loved her.  That made it much harder when she fully blocked us out and ghosted us. Everything got to much for her and the only thing she knew how to do when it all got bad was leave; this left us spiraling, wondering if she was okay because she never answered any of our texts or calls. After a while she wasn’t the only one hurting, we were too. We all had our own stuff going on and suddenly one of our best friend up and left with no warning. 

My other friend and I spent a month spiraling until she(the one who dropped us) finally reached out. She told us that she was getting help, going to therapy, but the damage was already done. She had left us scarred and unable to trust anyone fully, ever again. But after she explained it to us we started to see how much she changed; so reluctantly, we accepted the offer of being her friend again. Then we started rebuilding our friendship and trying to maneuver around what had happened; we try to avoid bringing up that whole situation in general. But now we are in a good spot and almost back to where we used to be, but I doubt we will ever be that close again.

One of my friends made a huge mistake, one that could’ve been unforgivable. But during that time alone she grew not only as a friend, but as a person. She’s more confident, and she is learning how to talk about her feelings. So even though she did some not okay things, this shows how she learned from her actions and can continue to be a good person.

“Moscow, Sep 2013 – 02” by Ed Yourdon is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.

“Group hug” by Oliver Quinlan is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0.

“Sky” by Blueocean64 is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.